Hi all, I feel like I hijacked Naladav's post earlier, sorry. So here's my update. We had a series of appointments on Tuesday. It now looks like we're going to lose them both. The bigger one's heart has got worse not better and he now has half a working heart. He's only alive because of my oxygen. The smaller one is alive but not growing and has no renal activity or fluid around him. Not sure what happens next, we have some big decisions to make and I'm not sure I can face another termination. But also not sure I can face waiting for either a miscarriage or two babies with different, severe and complex needs who are not likely to live for very long. That's not what we wanted for my four year old, and I can't believe we're here again. The Prof said if it were him he'd terminate, such is the prognosis.
Not helping is that husband and I are now disagreeing on a few things. I think we should tell our daughter something (she just thinks mummy is poorly at the moment) he thinks we shouldn't say a thing. I think we should have a larger funeral than just the two of us as we'll need more support and we won't be TTC again so these are now our children so I think we should include close family. He wants it to be just is again, partly I think because his family wouldn't come but mine would.
So we have some tough times ahead. I wish I knew what to do.
Not helping is that husband and I are now disagreeing on a few things. I think we should tell our daughter something (she just thinks mummy is poorly at the moment) he thinks we shouldn't say a thing. I think we should have a larger funeral than just the two of us as we'll need more support and we won't be TTC again so these are now our children so I think we should include close family. He wants it to be just is again, partly I think because his family wouldn't come but mine would.
So we have some tough times ahead. I wish I knew what to do.