Feeling guilty and scared

I had an early scan yesterday and saw a little heart beating away and a little bean tucked up safe and sound or so I thought. Since this morning I have been bleeding - light but red. I am hoping that it is just from the internal scan yesterday as the sonographer was pretty "thorough" and had a good poke around every corner! I spoke to the epu today and the nurse said to come back in for another scan. I'm going tomorrow at 9am. I now feel really guilty - if I'd just left my little bean in peace and waited a few more weeks (instead of needing reassurance) then I wouldn't be in this situation, and them I feel scared that I will go tomorrow and there won't be a heart beat any more. I have had 2 miscarriages in the past and know there's nothing you can do but still feel like I should have just done nothing and then I wouldn't be in this silly situation. I'm also worried that this might be the end of my journey, I've been pregnant 6 times in 7 years (have a ds and dd), am 40 and don't know if I am brave enough to keep going....

Sorry for the pity party for 1 but need to get my thoughts out.

Debs xx